She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah
She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah
With a love like that
You know you should be glad
-The Beatles
I’m not sure I’ve ever met anyone that loves her babies as much as my friend Erica. The space that we call friendship encompasses too many years to count at this point and carries with it a love for documenting, film, grain, black and white, death, laughter, and you can throw some pain in there as well. We became friends through our mutual love of documentary photography online. Yet another example of a beautiful friendship cultivated from a distance. She in Michigan and I in Georgia. The first time I ever met Erica in person was after hoping in my car and driving to Alabama to meet while she was at a workshop so that we could shoot film and scenes inside the local Waffle House. To date still one of my favorite photos was taken over a plate of waffles with her.
Erica was the first person to encourage me to try film again in a meaningful way. Ok I think I pretty much remember her forcing me at one point but clearly now I’m glad she did. There is something about the way we both think behind the camera that has always bonded us. We love the same kinds of emotions and sometimes we don’t even have to say a word and we both know which photos move us. She’s definitely my soul sister in so many ways.
When Erica asked me if she could hire me to fly up and capture her precious number 3 there was no way I could say no. I took off in the morning right before Christmas and landed into a weekend that felt like home. I got to snuggle her babies that feel just like my own. Being so removed from a newborn in my own home, it’s always a reminder to me of just how strong mamas are in this vulnerable time. The first few days home are not easy and there is an honesty and reality that unfolds as you step into new roles that are changing either for the first time or again in a new and different way. I think the one thing I’ve learned from my own experience is just how much we need others during this time.
Not only did I get the chance to document this family, but I got a chance to be there as a friend.
We documented the back and forth of juggling older kids and the reality that they still have needs as much as their new sibling. We documented them getting to know their baby sister. We documented making grandma’s Christmas cookies with sticky hands and stolen batter. I watched as a sweet newborn was passed from one loving set of arms to another. I watched as a big sister blossomed into a loving caretaker. I watched as a new big brother snapped photos alongside me to show his mother his latest work of art (he’s pretty amazing by the way I have proof) and inserting himself into the frame in every way that says “see me I’m important too”. We embraced what it feels like to be a family of five. We acknowledged the highs and the lows and everything in between. Sometimes we chased the light. Sometimes we chased the moments instead. As I left, Erica said to me that it felt like a gift for me to be there so she could take some photos herself and just have some moments that she so desperately needed. This was a true collaboration between friends and I’m so grateful I was the one she chose to be there. I am incredibly honored my beautiful friend wanted something real from these moments to remember.
I saw this poster in her home all nicely framed and I knew it’d be a part of our story from those days. I hope she always knows that I love her just like in these versus.
With a love like that, you know you should be glad.
