I haven't blogged in awhile and I've done it with intention. At the end of 2014 I put down my camera for awhile and began a process of self-healing. A move, life changes, and a lot on my mind. Today I want to share it with you.
I've had a really hard time recently with all the noise and self-doubt that is so overwhelming in this business. When I started my business in 2013 right after my mom passed away my purpose was to connect with others. I have never had any intention of being the most popular or liked photographer. I've never wanted a busy client calendar either. All I wanted was to connect with others through my images and words. Why then was I contemplating only shooting for myself again? It is all due to fear.
The beginning of February we had a rare sunny day poke out from the depths of a cold winter and I was able for the first time to start taking photos again…with intent and purpose. I was happy. A lot of change is happening in my life. My kids are getting older and so am I. I can't let fear control my life but it holds a grip so tight that at times I feel like I can't breathe. Fear of not doing it right, fear of no one connecting with me, fear of allowing my voice to be heard in all it's glory, fear that I am not enough.
This day I let all that go and connected again with a medium that helps me heal from the wounds in my heart and mind that are ever present. I'm beginning to understand that perhaps speaking from the heart is one of the most brave things I can do and a gift I can give to others who may need to hear my voice. A new friend shared with me a quote that I'm holding onto like an earthworm cupped tightly in a child's hand. And today is the start of taking my voice to higher places.
“In order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen – really seen." – Brene Brown
Here is the result of that day I let my heart and ultimately myself be seen again.